Thursday, June 4, 2009

-=Wow, a Whole Year.=-

Hi.  This is Sir, speaking to you live from deep within My Secret Lair.  This is where we  have the Blog-O-Matic Hidden away, and we are currently re-programming him so he can't cause any more mischief like that Zachary Smith post.  It seems that that is how almost all of my Experiments end up these days, they are always developing "Intelligence" and trying to escape.  {and/or kill me}
But that's okay, because the mere fact that I have survived this long means that we may yet make it to a second year!  I still can not believe that we have managed to hold out against the decay of the tubes which power the Electrik Aetherweb,  you folks in the audience today who are in the internet "Biz" know what I am talking about.  And we have not just survived, bit thrived! we have a Parent Website, where we store all the junk that won't fit here, we have made it past 100 posts, and I haven't been eaten {Or worse, Set back Financially} by one of my many Time-Saving Experiments!  Here are some numbers for you mathematicians out there,
•164 Posts {including this one}
•39 Comments, {geez, you guys don't comment much do you?
•So many changes in color/font/layout/ scheme that I can't count them.
•890 visits, {since Feb. 20th, when we got analytics}
•1,940 Pageviews.
•2.18 pages a visit
•60.67 Percent Bounce Rate
•00:04:33 average time spent on site.
•41.24% new visits!
•00.00£ Made. {that's right, this blog is not-for-profit!}
Well, its a start.  We here at the Save the Croissants Corporation thrive on  criticisim, Constructive or other wise, so if you see a mistake, or I just got something wrong, don't hesitate to comment.   But besides that, thank you for your countinued patronage,  because this blog is powered by you, the reader.  {and the coal we shovel into the Blog-O-Matic, but that's beside the point.}  and I know that the blog is mediocre, but its the sheer quantity of the mediocrity!  Anyway,  thanks for listening.  its nice to know I have some people who I can throw my ideas at.  {don't worry, I have insurance}

And I am still not making any money off this blog.  {@#$%!}
-=Best Regards.=-

Now Serving Quality Blog Since 2008!

Good day, and welcome to the Save the Croissants blog, where we have been serving  the Highest Quality Blog to the Tri-state area for exactly a year! here at the Save the Croissants blog we are committed to bringing you the Highest Quality Blog, our trained staff* puts every post on this Blog through hours of vigorous testing, editing, and reformation, night and Day, Seven days a Week, Even weekends! here at the Save the Croissants Blog we never let Sickness, Sleep,  or Human Rights Activists get in the way of bringing you the highest Quality Blog out there, our Friendly Staff is always ready to answer your most important questions, and our customer service rating  is the highest in the Tri-State Area! please visit our popular Company Store!*  where you can buy Save the Croissants related merchandise,   such as: Mugs, T-shirts, Cheap Plastic Junk Made in China, and much more! We here at the Save the Croissants Blog are Committed
to bringing you the highest quality programming we can find out there. Such classics as: "the Continuing weekly adventures of Dr. Zachary Smith H.M.O." Sir Jacobs daily photograph"  "from the journal of Sir Jacob." and many more, have Made us the highest rated blog on the internet!*  

Come back tomorrow for more interesting dialogue from The Desk our Glorious Editor,
Sir Jacob, Editor in Chief, Save the Croissants
*we don't have a highly trained staff {of writers or otherwise.} we are not the highest rated blog on the internet,  and we don't have a company store.  
its just me.
tough beans.