Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The C.W.A. of Dr. Z. Smith: Episode #77: Clinically

Last Week as you Recall…

Dr. Smith's mind, comfortable in the warm, pink fog of nearly-awake, sighed. 
Unfortunately, you can only be nearly-awake for so long. 

-=fig. 553: stuck=-
Dr. Smith sat up in the warm, cozy bed.
  "I feel…Great!"  He said.
   "You should," replied Capt. Brown, who was sitting nearby. "They pumped you so full of pain medication I was starting to get worried you wouldn't want to wake up."
Dr. Smith took stock of his flowery surroundings.
   "Where am I?"  He asked.
    "According to the plaque on the door, room three-seventy-seven a.   It was the first one that the E.M.T's came to."
"So I'm inside The House?"
"Yeah, it's just a flowery room."
 Dr. Smith became aware of the remarkably uncomfortable clothes he was wearing.
   "What am I wearing?"
   "Scrubs.  It was either scrubs or that dress thing they make the patients wear.  And it's only because I'm loud they didn't put you in the dress thing."
   "Thanks, I guess."
    "You're welcome."
Dr. Smith looked at Capt.  Brown, he looked pretty good for a stabbing victim.
   "What happened to you?  You were stabbed!  How come you aren't in the hospital?"
    "Oh it was just a—" Capt. Brown winced "—Flesh wound.  I got out days ago."
"Oh."  The meaning of the words took awhile to reach Dr. Smith's heavily medicated mind.
   "Wait… 'Days ago'?  How long have I been out!"
 Capt. Brown shrugged.  "About a week, But you haven't been asleep the whole time, you came and went.  You did sustain some pretty serious brain damage.  But I got the second-best brain surgeon in the city to look after you."
   "What was the first-best brain surgeon doing?"
   "Being operated on."
    "Oh, yeah, that's me isn't it.  I forgot."
 Dr. Smith tried to stand up.
 Twelve minutes later he woke up in bed.
 "What happened?"
 "You passed out.   You may feel great but that's just the medication talking.  Don't move."
"For how long?"  There was more than a note of complaint in his voice.
  "The docs said not to let you move for at least another week."
    A thought occurred to Dr. Smith.
   "But what if I have to…?"
   "There's a ceramic bowl underneath the bed."
They both shuddered.   No one was looking forward to the ceramic bowl.
Dr. Smith sighed. 
  Laying in bed for days is great if you're asleep, but if you're awake it is one of the most boring things ever, Second only to clothes shopping.
  After the second day Capt. Brown was called away on matters of city-wide importance that seemed to mainly consist of mounds of paperwork, and  Once Capt. Brown was gone, the doctors came back, they were proper doctors and as far as Dr. Smith could tell not one of them was Romanian.     
Sometimes Jeeves would come in with food,  and it was through Jeeves that Dr. Smith learned what had happened after he had gone out to look for food. 
"-zzz I Repeat, the war is over!  The french have finally surrenderedzzz-"
Capt. Brown turned off the radio.   
"I guess that mean I have to go." He said. 

-=fig. 554: goo-goo eyes=-

"Will I ever see you again?"  Asked Ms. Teresa Phillips.
  "Probably." Capt. Brown answered, softly. "But you never know.  I may…never return." 
"Oh James!"  Ms. Teresa Phillips said, in a ridiculous voice. 
  "What, Jeeves!"  Capt. Brown said, annoyed that Jeeves had ruined his romantic-ish moment. 
 "I have found the reason the food disappeared." 
 "And what is the reason, Jeeves."   Capt. Brown's tone suggested that he didn't appreciate the interruption. 

-=fig. 555: furry beasts=-
 "We have been infested with furry beasts."