Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Continuing Weekly Adventures Of Dr. Zachary Smith H.M.O.

This Weeks Episode:
Episode #42:Terra Incognita
Last Week as you recall Dr. Zachary Smith, Capt. Brown, and the Jaguar had Driven into yet another hole in space and time, unfortunately this one Refused to admit our cameras, so For now, I am instigating Plan B.3 {B for Backup, you see.} One day I figured that at some point I would Lose every single Spyder-Cam I have following Dr. Smith, so, I–and without Dr. Smiths Knowledge– installed a minuscule camera dead center In Dr. Smiths glasses.  We cut to that camera…Now.

-=fig. 209:Do Not Panic Immediately We are redirecting your call to India=-
Oops, wait,
-=fig. 210: The View From Dr. Smiths Glasses=-
Aha!  This is the first actual field test of the Glasses-Cam, so it's good to know it actually Works! Sort of.  Not that great quality, but at least it's something.  Dr. Smith turns his head;
-=fig. 211: Capt. Brown=-
"When are we going to get there, Zachary?"  asks Capt. Brown.  "I couldn't say for sure James, this is a first for me.  But the reality meter says we're close!" What You can't hear is the ferocious wind that is whipping through– "Kind of a subtle breeze going through here, it's nice, keeps the heat off."  Of course, that could just be static coming through the tiny speaker on the glasses cam.  Dr. Smith lands the Jaguar, disembarks, and looks back at Capt. Brown.

-=fig. 212: You alright back there?=-
"Are you alright Back there James?"  "Fine *grunt* thank you, why don't the doors open?" "You know James, I Honestly don'– "*KAZAP* Dr. Smith's head snaps around, "What the Heck was that!?"
-=fig. 213: !? My, how I despise multiple exclamation marks, It's the sign of a diseased mind you know=-
A Hole Opens in the sky and two dark shapes drop from it. "Did you see that! Aliens!"  But Dr. Smith isn't so sure.  "They looked more like those camera-bots that keep following me around.  I thought we lost them in that last hole in timespace."  And Indeed Dr. Smith is right, for I have commissioned two more Spyder-Cams, and they made it just in time.


Darn it, that was the Glasses-cam Failing.  We need to switch to the new spyder cams right now!
I Don't care If they aren't done loading their software yet, we need them now!


Thank you.

 -=fig. 214: Loading software update 438204.a3=-
Well, that's what I Get for rushing art.

When the camera is done loading we rejoin Dr. Smith and Capt. Brown as they come across a campsite…

-=fig. 215: Wake up Man!=-
An obviously harried and tired Man slumbers fitfully as Capt. Brown walks up to him.
"SLEEPING ON THE JOB?" The Man Awakes sharply, "SIR NO SIR!" He barks. His Mind seems to catch up with his body, and he realizes what is happening.  "CAPT. BROWN SIR!  WE THOUGHT WE HAD LOST YOU SIR!"  "At ease…?" "SERGEANT CAPSICUM SIR!"  "Well then at ease Sgt. Capsicum, We?"

-=fig. 216: Yes yes, At ease Soldier=-
"SIR!"  "At ease, what's your name Soldier?"  "Lieutenant Briggs Sir. Thank goodness you are here Sir." Capt. Brown and Dr. Smith share a glance. "Why?" asks Capt. Brown. Lt. Briggs Launches into His Story: "It Was my job to guard the camp from all intruders–" "Wait, what Camp? Start A bit earlier Lieutenant." Lt. Briggs scratches his head, "How far back would you like Sir?"  "The Explosion." "Most of us were in a group, and you and Dr…You, Sir were off to one side, the Robot was in the middle. So when everything exploded, The majority of the R.L.C.R.P. East Brigade were transported here, to this Hard area.

-=fig. 217:The East Brigade=-
"Brigadier Black Had us Calculate the area, and it came out to be bigger than the entirety of Legopolis.  Sgt. Capsicum and I were stationed on the highest plateau the East Brigade could reach,
-=fig. 218: East Ridge=-
"East Ridge.  Even from our high perch we could smell Cookie's Famous Leftover Soup. Our Mission?  To keep watch for any nefarious villains that might decide to attack and to Notify Brigadier Black immediately should any villains suddenly arise.

-=fig. 219: They Came from Behind=-
"We Failed. I have no idea where they came from, they seemed to come from–" "Nowhere in particular?" Lt. Briggs continues: "That's right Doctor. From our Perch The Sgt. And I could see exactly what happened.

-=fig. 220: The Dark Army=-
"The Dark Army Marched in perfect syncopation, as if they're robots, or something.  They also carried some sort of giant black weapon.

-=fig. 221: They Didn't Stand a Chance=-
"The East Brigade Didn't stand a chance.  The Dark Army Wouldn't stop coming, they were shot, and wouldn't stop coming.  They Activated the Dark weapon and there was this…Dark explosion.  If you'd believe it,
-=fig. 222: A Dark Explosion=-
"I think some got away, but not many.  When the darkness cleared, the Sgt. and I finally got down to the ground, too late I am sad to report.

-=fig. 223: Too Late=-
"I Don't know what happened, really. One minute the camp is full of bustling, mostly confused, Policemen, the next, gone."  Dr. Smith nods. It all fits.  "So what do we do with these Fine examples of military precision?  They won't fit in the car–" An Idea strikes Dr. Smith, {squarely in the ear} so he interrupts; "Wait a minute, Maybe they will, wait, Wait right here, I'll bring the car around."

As the figure of Dr. Smith recedes into the distance, Sgt. Capsicum wanders around from in front of the camp "MAY I ASK A QUESTION SIR!" Capt. Brown just shakes his head and chuckles. "At Ease, what's your question?"  "Is the Doctor Leaving us here to die? SIR!"  "Relax yourself man, I know Dr. Smith, He wouldn't just leave us here.  Probably."
-=fig. 224: Probably=-
Indeed Dr. Smith is not abandoning the poor chaps to die, But how will he fit four people in a car made for two?  Dr. Smith parks the car carefully, so as to not squash any errant policemen.

-=fig. 225: Just Chuck Everything In=-
"Are you Sure this will work…Doctor? It doesn't look all that spacious in there…?"  "I'm very sure Lt. Briggs." Capt. Brown smiles, enjoying some private joke. "How are you going to fit all that In, Zachary?" He asks. "Remember I explained how I modified my suitcase to be a hole into the R.L.B.S.?"  Realization dawns "So you did that–" "No. I actually just found the hole in the trunk already there, so I stabilized it, and prevented it from spreading to other dimensions.  With simple preventative measures like this this whole mess could have been avoided.  Now I know Not everyone has a degree in particle physics, but its pretty simple just shore up an existing hole if you have a basic understanding of the concept."  Every else just rolls their eyes, but only when Dr. Smith can't see them.  "But where does it go?" Asks Lt. Briggs. "You know, I was never quite sure, I think it's the dungeon of some castle or other, but I went down there long ago with a bucket of pant and a shovel. It's a quite nice Spare bedroom now." "I just hope nothing can get through…Doctor." Dr. Smith just wave hi hand as if in contempt of the very idea.  "Not even I could get through that door, and believe me, I tried."
-=fig. 226: Careful Now, That First Step is a Doozy=-
Thus Consoled, first Lieutenant Briggs and then Sergeant Capsicum crawled–Carefully–into the trunk. "Now Don't worry you guys, when I close this lid, you won't be locked in, to get out just pull the green lever here." Dr. Smith points, "You alright in there?" They are. Once the two rescued Policemen are safely tucked away, Dr. Smith and Capt. Brown Hop into the Jaguar, and fly away.
-=fig. 227: Fade out=-
They fly around the area, checking for the lost policemen.

No one is found.

They Move on.

Join us next week for our next exciting episode:

Episode #43: Here There Be Dragoons

-=Best Regards=-

Sir Jacob D. Fredrickson Esq.

Chief Executive Officer of Early Bird Industries, Inc.