Tuesday, October 13, 2009

The Continuing Weekly Adventures Of Dr. Zachary Smith H.M.O.

This Weeks Episode:
Episode #38: Act Three. Enter Villain.  Exit Hero. 
Last week as you recall, I left you with a bit of a cliff hanger, As I recall I was saying;
NO! I can't Be! It's Dr. Smith!
-=fig. 174: Dr. Smith?=-
Indeed it is Dr. Smith, But there is one major difference Between this Dr. Smith, and our Hero: where our Hero, the real Dr. Smith, is good, this Dr. Smith is evil.  In fact, this Dr. Smith is the exact opposite of the real Dr. Smith, at least character-wise.  To be his true opposite, this Doppelgänger would have to be extraordinarily stupid, but he isn't.  In fact he is as smart as The Real Dr. Smith.  But unfortunately the amount of evil contained in his body forces his clothes to take on a dark shade, so no matter what he wears, it will turn black with time.   Dr. Smith, still chained to the slab can't see what's going on over to his left.  but before he passes out he struggles against his restraints, turns his head and through half-working eyes sees this:
-=fig. 175: Through half-working eyes=-
He then passes out.
Hours pass.
Traveling through multiple dimensions without an unspecified number of day's worth of rest really takes it out of you.
So does having your brain raided for Dopplegänger material.
But when Dr. Smith Finally does awake,  he is refreshed and ready to…Whoops, forgot about the chains.  But Dr. Smith, the product of a wasted childhood {When all the other kids were being arrested, he was reading books} Knows exactly what to do in this situation, and a quick search of his pockets reveals:
1. A modified Swiss army knife {Now with laser, pocket compass, and pliers!}
2. A pocket-sized lock-pick set, gifted to him by his estranged uncle Edward
3. The key to his front door,
4. A hair pin.
He decides to use the hair pin on the locks, but they are down by his feet.  So he decides that, even though it feels like cheating, he will just use his Swiss-Army knife the cut through the chains.  He was really looking forward to picking the lock too.  But a laser is as good an escape method as any.  Having successfully escaped from his dire fate, Dr. smith looks around at the assembled machinery.
-=fig. 176: The Control panel=-
Dr. Smith examines the control panel, "Hey Mr. Narrator, any one else here?" he says, quietly.   No Dr. Smith, Just you and me.  "Good, you warn me if anyone is coming."   Sure.   Dr. Smith examines the control panel closer, squinting a little.  Suddenly the arrangement makes sense.  "Von BadGuy is Left-handed!  I see! this goes here then there's this bit…"  Ripping bits of machinery seemingly at random, Dr. Smith continues to mutter to himself.  "Shoddy workmanship, really,  I would have put this bit here, then there's no point for this whole section.  How did he even control this thing? there's no…  Wait, There it is.  But half of it's In Backwards!"  It's at this point that Dr. Smith rolls up his sleeves, pulls open his suitcase, and roots around for his favorite wrench.  "Let's do this right." He says.
-=fig. 177: Let's do this right=-
30 Minutes later the infernal machine is superficially the same, but internally it is humming along at twice it's normal operating speed.   Dr. Smith slams levers and pushes buttons at lightning speed, and there is a smell of ozone in the air.  Lightning jumps from the control panel to the glass box beside it,
-=fig. 178: Nothing Happens=-
Nothing Happens.   Why is Nothing Happening?   Dr. Smith hits the Control Panle with his wrench and the glass box Explodes!  Dr. Smith throws himself to the ground, covering his head with his arms in the standard "Exploding Object" Maneuver.  Now Standing in the wreckage of the glass box are Capt. Brown and his Rooftop Police.
-=fig. 179: The Standard "Exploding Object" Maneuver=-
The rooftop police stared for a moment, with the expressions of people who suddenly, and through no action of their own, are now in a new environment.  Two of them, despite being in heavy winter gear, started to make a fire.  Dr. Smith gets up and brushes imaginary dust off his clothes. 
 "hello James, that was awfully dramatic."  "What are we doing in the Rather Large Blank Spot Zachary?" Capt. James Brown asks, carefully.  Dr. Smith takes a minute to think this one over,  "Well, the evil Count Villiam Von TipRău {Fifth count of Ţara Bârsei} has cloned me and now plans to take over Legopolis forcibly."  Capt. Brown Thinks this over.  Notice he doesn't scoff or act incredulous, for he knows Dr. Smith, And Knows that he would never lie.  "What does this Clone look like?" He asks.
"It's More of a Dolppelgänger, really. He looks just like me, but with a black hat, pants, and suitcase."  Capt. Brown nods, and says "We would be honored to help you track down this Doppelgänger of yours, Wouldn't we lads?" This last bit he shouts over his shoulder at the encamped rooftop police.  A chorus of "Right!"  Rings back, and one whispered "Whaddhesay?" and another "Dunno, but he's the boss."   "Alright everyone, stand back! I'm gonna open 'er up." Everyone except Dr. Smith shuffles away from the control panel, and once everyone is safe, Dr. Smith Pulls a Switch.
-=fig. 180: Dr. Smith Pulls the switch=-
The very fabric of reality wobbles as the Giant red machine {Controlled By Dr. Smith} Fires A blinding Beam of Light at the  "Wall" of the R.L.B.S.  Once the machine cools off, Capt. Brown Yells at the assembled Rooftop Police, "Alright you GroundLubbers, Attack formation 45a,  Battle of Income Taxes variation!"
They Burst through the new hole, armed to the teeth.
-=fig. 181: They Burst through the new-found hole in reality=-
Something is Very, Very, Wrong.
"CLEAR!"  Yells a member of the L.C.R.P {Legopolis City Royal Rooftop Police, It's easier in abbreviation} It is Clear, In fact.  Very, Very, Clear.  The Members of The L.C.R.P.  Make their way to key points along the street, practically disappearing into thin alleys.  Dr. Smith and Capt. Brown bring up the rear, and are met with a deafening Silence.
-=fig. 182: Practically disappearing into thin alleys=-
There are no sounds.  No Birds Sing. No crickets Chirp.  No people talk.  No cars go past.
Except the sound of Dr. Smith And Capt. Brown's footsteps and whispered conversation.  We swing the camera over that way, slowly.
-=fig. 183: No Sound at all=-
Dr. Smith, Feeling he had to say something, says: "Quiet Isn't it?" That was an understatement.  "Where Did the Colors Go?" Asks Capt. Brown.  Dr. Smith Just shakes his head sadly. "I Don't Know, this is much worse than I thought."  An Idea, Flying through the air at great speed, Hits Dr. Smith's Left ear,  travels through his anterior auricular branches and speeds towards his brain region.  His Mind, a seasoned professional, had already rigged up a net for just such an occasion.  Dr. Smith Brightens up.  "We Need to get to my house quickly."  He says.
-=fig. 184: Dr. Smith's House=-
"It Is Here!  I Knew It!" Dr. Smith says, elated. "What's so special about your house Zachary?" Capt. Brown Asks.  "The fact that it's here means A. This is the wrong dimension, or B. Jeeves landed it and we have a witness to the whole mess."
They enter through Dr. Smith's front door, and are immediately are presented with…Dr. Smith's kitchen.  And two strange robots.
-=fig. 185: Two Strange robots=-
Dr. Smith waves his hand in front of the two robots "faces".  Capt. Brown asks, "Who Are these Robots Zachary?  Do you know them?" Dr. Smith shakes his head, "No, I've never–" he is interupted by a moan from the backyard.  Dr. Smith and Capt. Brown share a brief glance, before running out to the yard.
  -=fig. 186: Jeeves, Fading fast.=-
Dr. Smith Finds Jeeves, slumped against the garage wall, Literally fading fast.
Join us next week for our next exciting episode:
 Same Time, Same blog.

-=Best Regards=-

Sir Jacob D. Fredrickson Esq.

Chief Executive Officer of Early Bird Industries, Inc.