we are reporting today from my house in the french countryside. that is correct, i have returned. hooray. there were some scruffy pirates here who had captured my house and were holding the staff hostage, but i quickly turned the tables with a quick display of swordsmanship
I think I may have an artistic photographer following me around. these pictures just keep coming and I have no idea who takes them.
I found Mac, he was tied up in the kitchen, has been for the last couple of days.
any way, i handed over the hoodlums to the local authorities,
the three of them are wanted in over 12 different countries for house theft, piracy against the Crown, and Tax evasion. they are currently being fought over by France, Britain, America, Germany, Austria, Italy… Europe in general really.
I declined the reward, naturally.
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And have a nice rest–of–your–day you guys.
—Jacob